It was four years from now when I was missing integrity:
I could commit to any activity but I wasn’t able to come thru many times.
I didn´t use schedules or a calendar back then but if I would have: they would have been hectically busy.
What happened was that I used to say YES to anything that made me a bit excited, I would never say NO.
Of course, when the time came, I didn’t even have the energy or desire to be involved in everything.
Even worst… I was spending all of this time on things that didn’t substantially serve me as a person and spending no time on those which did.
Being a super adaptable and optimistic person as I am would help me entertain all of these situations and even find the silver linings. It was kind of agood but also a bad thing… which now I know it means was bad.
Well, before I continue beating my old self down, I’ll go to the point:
One thing is to go with the flow. Another thing is to ride the flow.
I understood that after years of partially enjoying life. Of entering different stages without firmly being present. Of course, at that moment it didn’t seem like that but now I realize.
Going with the flow was fun, surprising and careless; requieres a certain amount of trust (which is not a bad) but the tricky thing is that it leads to negligence, disappointment and eventually brings insecurity.
Riding the flow in the other hand, is fun, surprising and intentional, requires trust and gives birth to confidence.
This is not about being egoistical and only do what one wants, engaging on what’s important for others is even more retributive.
What I am talking about is selecting those things in which one will be involved and take ownership of it.
These are a few practical pointers that come to mind:
Taking a couple of seconds before answering is valid.
Having reasons to pass on something is valid.
Being intentional of the way one wants to approach certain thing is right.
Reminding oneself of the desired approach is necessary.
Meditating on what one wants serves in many levels.
Following steps to get it is rewarding.
Motivation needs discipline.
Saying «No» builds character and character builds confidence.
So! Let’s crack on and ride on.
Cheers!
Adriana.